MAD #449 — January 2005

"Parents want their kids to stand up for themselves — just not to them!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Contents Page
  1
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.

  Notes

  • Photos of Hermann Mejia, Mort Drucker, Nick Meglin, Tom Richmond and Sam Viviano at the National Cartoonist Society Reuben Awards ceremony held in Kansas City, Missouri, Al Jaffee's fold-in for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart Presents America (The Book), Ad for The MAD Bathroom Companion — The Mother Load book
  2–4
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine)
• The Fundalini Pages

  Random Acts of Mindless Dept.

  Friends of Fundalini Notes

  • "Friends of Fundalini" list of contributors not originally attached to the articles in this section: Scott Bricher, Teresa Burns Parkhurst, Tom Bunk, Tom Cheney, Desmond Devlin, Garth Gerhart, Jeff Kruse, Hermann Mejia, Patrick Merrell, Kevin Pope, Joe Raiola, Irving Schild, David Shayne, Mike Snider, Johnny Styne, Jack Syracuse, Rick Tulka — DETAILS

  • First... Then... What's Next? — Art by Rick Tulka
  • Highlights of the New Seinfeld DVD
  • dis-Harmony (three appearances) — Photo by Irving Schild
  • Melvin & Jenkins' Guide to Church Socials — Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Kevin Pope
  • Bitterman — doesn't go to church — Garth Gerhart
  • The Puzzle Nook — "never leave important decisions to ---ce" — Patrick Merrell
  • Celebrity Cause of Death Betting Odds — Mel Gibson — Written by Mike Snider / Art by Jack Syracuse
  • A Jailhouse Letter from Martha Stewart — Written by Desmond Devlin
  • WiFi Wonderland — Art by Tom Bunk
  • The Godfrey Report
  • Tips to Make Your Holiday More Enjoyable — Teresa Burns Parkhurst
  • Video Game Review — Dangerous Assignment: Assigned to Danger — Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Hermann Mejia
    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • MAD Classics #5 — February 2006
  • Pull My Cheney! — seeing eye kangaroo — Tom Cheney
  • Magazine Corrections You May Have Missed — TV Guide's original assessment of Friends was wrong — Written by Jeff Kruse
  6–8
• Ad for Aaron's "Our Dream Machines Have Gone MAD!" — MAD Racing Partner
  9
• Lewd & Disorder: Criminal Malcontent (TV satire)

  Trying Wolf Once Too Often Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Tom Richmond
  10–14
• Spy vs. Spy — corked chimney fired

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Peter Kuper

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • Spy Vs. Spy 2 — The Joke and Dagger Files — 2007
  • Spy vs. Spy — The Top Secret Files — 2011
  16–17
• Monroe and... Christmas (It's a Wonderful Strife)

  Angster's Paradise Dept.

  Written by Anthony Barbieri / Art by Bill Wray
  20–23
• Ad for jegs.com — MAD Racing NHRA Spy vs. Spy T-Shirt and Diecast Car
  24
• The MAD 20 Dumbest People, Events and Things of 2004

  • 1. Abu Ghraib — "Donny Rumsfeld and the Prisoners of Abu Ghraib" — (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban book cover parody) — Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Richard Williams

    Reprinted in 2 collections

    • The MAD War on Bush — 2007
    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014

    26
  • 2. Janet Jackson's "Wardrobe Malfunction" — "Attack of the 50 Yd. Line Woman" — (Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman movie poster parody) — Art by Mark Stutzman

    Reprinted in 4 collections

    • Totally MAD — 2012
    • The Golden Treasury of Trash — Special Collector's Edition 2013
    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014
    • Totally Inside MAD — 2016

    27
  • 3. Howard Dean's Scream — (The Scream — Edvard Munch painting parody) — Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by James Warhola

    Reprinted in 4 collections

    • Totally MAD — 2012
    • The Best of the Worst! — Special Collector's Edition 2012
    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014
    • Totally Inside MAD — 2016

    28
  • 4. Donald Trump — "Forrest Trump" — (Forrest Gump movie poster parody) — sample

    Reprinted in 6 collections

    • MAD Color Classics #11 — April 2005
    • Totally MAD — 2012
    • The Best of the Worst! — Special Collector's Edition 2012
    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014
    • Totally Inside MAD — 2016
    • MAD About Trump — 2017

    29
  • 5. Steroid Testing in Baseball — (Peanuts parody) — Written by Jacob Lambert / Art by Jack Syracuse 30
  • 6. Dan Rather — "Mr. Not Credible" — (The Incredibles movie poster parody) — Art by Justin Gerard 31
  • 7. Paris Hilton — "The Game of The Simple Life" — (Life board game parody) — Art by Gary Hallgren 32–33
  • 8. Bush Jokes About WMDs — This One'll Kill Ya! — Written by Russ Cooper / Art by Tom Nick Cocotos

    Reprinted in 3 collections

    • The MAD War on Bush — 2007
    • MAD #497 — January 2009
    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014

    34
  • 9. Britney's First Wedding — "Drunken Bride" — (Modern Bride magazine cover parody) — Written by Joe Raiola and Charlie Kadau / Photos by Irving Schild 35
  • 10. Howard Stern — Patron Saint of the First Amendment — Art by Richard Williams

    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014

    36
  • 11. The NHL — "NHL Lockout 2004" — (computer game parody) — Written by Johnny Styne / Art by Scott Bricher 37
  • 12. Madonna Goes Kosher — "esther: like a sturgeon" — (Madonna: Like a Virgin album cover parody) — Written by Scott Maiko / Art by Hermann Mejia 38
  • 13. Pete Rose — "Field of Schemes" — (Field of Dreams movie poster parody) — Art by Sam Sisco

    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014

    39
  • 14. Ashlee Simpson Lip Synchs on SNL — "iFraud" — (iTunes ad parody) — Art by Scott Bricher 40
  • 15. Same Sex Weddings — "American Gaythic" — (American Gothic — Grant Wood painting parody) — Written by Patrick Merrell and Andrew J. Schwartzberg / Art by Tim Okamura 41
  • 16. Kobe Bryant's Apology Letter — Written by Desmond Devlin / Sculpture by Liz Lomax 42–43
  • 17. William Hung — "American Hung Association — Thank you for not singing." — (American Lung Association public service ad parody) 44
  • 18. John Kerry — "Identity Crisis" — (Infinite Crisis comic book cover parody) — Art by Tom Fowler / Color by Carrie Strachan of Wildstorm

    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far) — Special Collector's Edition 2014

    45
  • 19. Lindsay Lohan — "Obsessions with a Teenage D-Cup Queen" — (Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen movie poster parody) — Written by Jacob Lambert 46
  • 20. Coverage of the Reagan Funeral — Fold-In (Al Jaffee)

    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964-2010 — 2011

    47
  25
• A MAD Look at New Year's

  Serge-In General Dept.

  Sergio Aragones

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Stocking Stuffer — Special Collector's Edition 2016
  • MAD Stocking Stuffer — Special Collector's Edition 2019
  • MAD Hodgepodge of Humor — Vol. 3 — December 2025
  48–51
• One Fine Day at the Service Station

  Tune-Ups and Downs Dept.

  Written by Craig Boldman / Art by John Caldwell
  52 sample