Mad #309 March 1992

• Cover Artist: Jack Davis
• Cover Writer: Tom Hachtman

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• Ad for Super Special July 1992 - Collector's Series #3
• Contents Page
• Ad for Subscriptions with Mad Pin Collection Bonus
• Letters (photo of Richard Dean Anderson with #307)
• Sergio Aragones Drawn-Out Dramas
  **various places around the magazine
• Beverly Hills 911 (TV satire)
  (written by Dennis Snee / Mort Drucker art)
• Drama on Page 9 (John Caldwell)
• Mad's Christmas Carols for Modern Times
  (written by Tom Koch / Paul Coker, Jr. art)
• If Other Historical Eras Had Been as "Lawsuit Happy" as Ours is Today (written by Mike Snider / George Woodbridge art)
• Other "Diseases" of the Machine World
  (written by Mike Snider / Al Jaffee art)
• Spy vs. Spy (written by Russ Cooper / Bob Clarke art)
• The Mad Stages of... (Rick Tulka)
• Drama on Page 20 (John Caldwell)
• Mad's Minute-By-Minute Breakdown of Popular TV Shows (written by Russ Cooper / Sam Viviano art)
• The Rhyme of the Ailing President
  (written by Frank Jacobs / Gerry Gersten art)
• Using Sports Equipment in Everyday Life (Paul Peter Porges)
• An Underachiever is...
  (written by Mike Snider / Mort Drucker art)
• The Lighter Side of... (Dave Berg)
• A Mad Look at Tools (Sergio Aragones)
• Mad's Practice S.A.T. Questions (written by Frank Jacobs)
• Don (Duck) Edwing Hangs Out at the Mall
• Quandary Heap (TV satire)
  (written by Dick DeBartolo / Angelo Torres art)
• New Cabinet-Level Departments We'd Like to See
  (written by Dan Birtcher / George Woodbridge art)
• Fold-In -- What yo-yo like activity
  has its painful ups and downs? (Al Jaffee)
• Back Cover -- GQ - Geek's Quarterly Magazine (written by
  William T. Raschendorfer and Andrew J. Schwartzberg)