MAD #80 — July 1963

"Girls who try to be 'talking encyclopedias' should remember that reference books are never taken out!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Mayjag Washing Machines (ad parody)

  Photo by Lester Krauss

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • MADvertising — 2005
  C2
• Contents Page
  1
• Letters Dept.

  Notes

  • Ads for Alfred E. Neuman bust, Fink Along With MAD L.P., MAD "Twists" Rock 'N' Roll L.P., Subscriptions — "How does this strike you?" (sculpture by Giuseppe Baggi), Alfred E. Neuman portrait, A Golden Trashery of MAD
  2–3
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine) summary
• Mutiny on the Bouncy (movie satire)

  Tee-Hee-Ti Dept.

  Written by Larry Siegel / Art by Wally Wood

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • MAD Special #1 — Fall 1970
  4–9
• Brain Surgery

  Don Martin Dept. Part I

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 5 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • The Completely MAD Don Martin — 1974 Big Book
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — Don Martin — 2014
  10–11
• On the Boardwalk

  Don Martin Dept. Part II

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — Don Martin — 2014
  10–11
• Cherished Pages from Old Autograph Albums

  Blackboard Jingle Dept.

  Written by Stan Hart / Art by Bob Clarke
  12–14
• Movie Dialogue We'd Like to Hear

  Off the Beaten Sound-Track Dept. Part I

  Written by Harry Purvis / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  15
• Look What's Talking!

  Speaking From Pictures Dept.

  Dennis Altman, Martin Cohen, Robert Natkin, Robert Fryml
  16–17
• The Lighter Side of Dog Owners

  Berg's-Eye View Dept.

  Dave Berg

  Reprinted in 5 collections

  • MAD Special #1 — Fall 1970
  • MAD Special #128 — June 1998
  • MAD's Greatest Artists: Dave Berg — 2013
  • MAD #24 — April 2022
  • MAD Goes to the Dogs & Other Beasties! — Special Collector's Edition 2024
  18–21
• It's About Time!

  Spec-Tick-Tock-Ular Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Jack Rickard

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  22–23
• Misery is a Cold Hot Dog (book parody)

  Roasted Peanuts Dept.

  Written by Larry Siegel / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • The Ridiculously Expensive MAD — 1969
  • MAD Special #36 — Fall 1981
  • MAD XL #14 — March 2002
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  24–27 sample
• More Movie Dialogue We'd Like to Hear

  Off the Beaten Sound-Track Dept. Part II

  Written by Harry Purvis / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  28
• How a Best-Seller is Born

  Volume Business Dept.

  Written by Larry Siegel / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  29–32
• The MAD Baseball Primer

  Learning the Score Dept.

  Written by Stan Hart / Art by Jack Rickard

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • MAD Special #38 — Spring 1982
  • MAD #21 — October 2021
  33–35
• Father's Day Cards from Special People

  Pop's Corn Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • MAD About Dad — 2004 (excerpt)
  36–37 sample
• The Rejection Slip

  Many Unhappy Returns Dept.

  Tom Hudson

  Reprinted in 8 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • The Ridiculously Expensive MAD — 1969
  • MAD Special #45 — Winter 1983
  • MAD Special #131 — October 1998
  • Inside MAD — 2013
  • MAD Picks — Special Collector's Edition 2013
  • Totally Inside MAD — 2016
  38–40
• On the Beach

  Don Martin Dept. Part III

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • The Completely MAD Don Martin — 1974 Big Book
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  41–42
• The Tenth Hour (TV satire)

  That's How the Kookie Crumbles Dept.

  Written by Lou Silverstone / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #1 — Fall 1970
  43–47
• Russian "Russian Roulette"

  The "Red" Badge of Courage Dept.

  Sergio Aragones

  Reprinted in 8 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • Burning MAD — 1968 (Paperback #25)
  • The Ridiculously Expensive MAD — 1969
  • MAD's Sergio Aragones On Parade — 1979 Big Book
  • MAD Special #45 — Winter 1983
  • MAD About the Sixties — 1995
  • MAD For Decades — 2007
  • MAD's Greatest Artists: Sergio Aragones — 2010
  48 sample
• Ad for MAD's Don Martin Steps Out! and MAD's Don Martin Bounces Back! paperbacks
  C3
• Back Cover — Lady Clinic Plastic Surgeons — Is it True… Blondes Have More Fun?

  Photo by Lester Krauss

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • The Ridiculously Expensive MAD — 1969
  • MAD Special #40 — Fall 1982
  • MAD About the Sixties — 1995
  • MAD Art — 2002
  • MADvertising — 2005
  C4