MAD #44 — January 1959

"Kissing a girl because she lets you is like scratching a place that doesn't itch!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Culvert Reserve (ad parody)

  Art by Kelly Freas
  C2
• Contents Page
  1
• Some Items "For Sale — Cheap"

  Marginal Thinking Dept.
  (various obscure places around the magazine)
• Letters Dept.

  Notes

  • Plug for More Trash From MAD #1, ads for "What, Me Worry" Kid portrait, The Brothers Mad, MAD For Keeps, Gift Subscriptions
  2–3
• The Coming Attractions Don't Always Show Exactly What's Coming!

  Sneaky Prevues Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Wally Wood

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  • The MAD Frontier — 1962 (Paperback #12)
  4–7
• International Advertising

  Globaloney Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Forever — 1959
  • The Worst From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  8–10 sample
• Holiday-Weekend Telethon

  Crash Program Dept.

  Written by Dee Caruso and Bill Levine / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  • The MAD Frontier — 1962 (Paperback #12)
  11–13
• Junior Editions

  Crib Sheet Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Wally Wood

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • More Trash From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  14–15
• Memories of Summer

  Don Martin Dept.

  Don Martin

  • In the Park
    Reprinted in 4 collections

    • MAD Forever — 1959
    • MAD Follies #1 — 1963 Annual
    • The Completely MAD Don Martin — 1974 Big Book
    • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • At the Seashore
    Reprinted in 4 collections

    • MAD Forever — 1959
    • MAD Follies #1 — 1963 Annual
    • The Completely MAD Don Martin — 1974 Big Book
    • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • Hunting in the Fields
    Reprinted in 2 collections

    • MAD Follies #1 — 1963 Annual
    • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  16–18
• Basketball

  Dribble Drivel Dept.

  Written by Al Jaffee / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  • The MAD Frontier — 1962 (Paperback #12)
  19–23
• Alfred E. Neuman's Family Tree

  The Root of All Evil Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Wally Wood

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  • The MAD Frontier — 1962 (Paperback #12)
  • MAD About the Fifties — 1997
  • MAD XL #12 — November 2001
  • Totally MAD — 2012
  • MAD #46 — December 2025
  24–26 sample
• "Walk — Don't Walk" Signals

  Signals Crossed Dept.

  Dave Berg

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The MAD Frontier — 1962 (Paperback #12)
  • Dave Berg's MAD Trash — 1977 Big Book
  27–29
• Custom-Made Christmas Cards

  X-Missiles Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Bob Clarke
  30–32
• How to Read Graphs

  Grid and Bear It Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Forever — 1959
  • The Worst From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  • MAD In Orbit — 1962 (Paperback #13)
  33–35
• Scenes We'd Like to See — The Monster and the Villagers

  Hollywood Dept.

  Written by E. Nelson Bridwell / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  • MAD Art — 2002
  • Horrifyingly MAD — 2011
  • MAD #45 — October 2025
  36
• The Search for Sleep

  Mind Over Mattress Dept.

  Written by Al Jaffee / Art by George Woodbridge
  37–39
• Next Year's Extra-Long Book Titles

  Gone to Great Lengths Dept.

  Written by Carl Memling / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Forever — 1959
  40
• Electrical Report

  Bob and Ray Dept.

  Written by Bob Elliott & Ray Goulding, Tom Koch / Art by Mort Drucker
  41–42 sample
• The North American Veeblefetzer Company's Veeble People

  Working Press Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #3 — 1960 Annual
  • MAD In Orbit — 1962 (Paperback #13)
  43–46
• Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

  Season's Greetings Dept.

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  47–48
• Ad — You'll Be "Chairman of the Board" in Your MAD T-Shirt!

  Photo by Larry Maleman
  C3 sample
• Back Cover — Alfred's Girlfriend Stares Out Window

  Art by Kelly Freas
  C4