Doug Gilford
Doug Gilford's MAD Cover Site
Contents Issues Reprints Paperbacks Books Pricelist Quiz About Search Idiots Features Movies TV Ads Dictionary Poster Links++ Randumb
MAD #531 front cover

MAD #531 — February 2015

Cover art: Mark Fredrickson
"Nowadays, 'junk' mail refers to when some guy sends you an unwanted sext!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

  • Contents Page
    It's the List We Can Do Dept.
    Notes
    featuring the First-Ever MAD Guarantee! — Written by Dick DeBartolo
    1
  • Letters and Tomatoes Dept.
    2–4
  • Drawn-Out Dramas
    Marginal Thinking Dept.
    Sergio Aragones
    (various obscure places around the magazine)
  • The Fundalini Pages
    Random Acts of Mindless Dept.
    • Free Holiday Apps You Probably Won't Need — Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by John Martz
    • The Kitchen Sink — Least-Watched Netflix Microgenres — Art by Bob Staake
    • The Speedy 6 — Recently Declassified Facts From the Pentagon — Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Rick Tulka
    • Eckstein Marks the Spot! — "So what's it going to take to get you folks into this car today?" — Bob Eckstein
    • Rejected Fortune Cookies
    • AOL Start-Up Screens We'd Like To See — Written by Jeff Kruse
    • Biographical Facts About Santa's Other Eight Reindeer — Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Anton Emdin
    • Questions We'd Love to See a Trainer Ask a Woozy NFL Player — Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Tom Bunk
    6–8
  • The MAD 20 Dumbest People, Events and Things of 2014
    Intro page art by Mick Coulas
    • 1. The NFL's Domestic Violence Problem — "Goodell Fellas" — (Goodfellas movie poster parody) 10
    • 2. Ebola Hysteria — "Are you suffering from Ebola symptoms?" — (CDC poster parody)
      Reprinted in 1 collection
      11
    • 3. The GM Recall Debacle — "The Fault in Our Cars" — (The Fault in Our Stars movie poster parody) — Written by Matt Lassen / Art by Scott Bricher 12
    • 4. The Militarization of the Police Department — (The Runaway Norman Rockwell painting parody) — Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Richard Williams — sample
      Reprinted in 1 collection
      13
    • 5. Target's Security Breach — "unbeatable prices! (very beatable encryption system!)" — (ad parody) — Written by Darren Johnson 14
    • 6. Obama Caught Off Guard — "Be Un-Prepared! Join the Barack Scouts of America" — (We, Too, Have a Job to Do — Norman Rockwell poster parody) — Art by Richard Williams 15
    • 7. The "Booty Trend" — "Behinds the Music" — (Behind the Music TV poster parody) — Art by Hermann Mejia 16
    • 8. Where has the lack of proper drugs caused misery, suffering and sometimes death? — Fold-In (botched executions) (Al Jaffee) 17
    • 9. American Apparel's CEO Pervert — "Charney and the Clothing Factory" — (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory book parody) — Written by Jason Katzenstein and Dan Abromowitz / Art by Gary Hallgren 18
    • 10. Hillary Clinton Cries Poverty — "1 Broke Girl" — (2 Broke Girls TV poster parody) 19
    • 11. The Washington Redskins Stand By Their Name — (apology letter to fans from Redskins' owner, Daniel Snyder) — Written by Desmond Devlin 20
    • 12. Chris Christie's Traffic Scandal — "Grand Shaft Auto: New Jersey" — (Grand Theft Auto game cover parody) — Art by Ward Sutton 21
    • 13. CNN's Endless Flight Coverage — (flight safety card parody) — Art by Timothy Shamey
      Reprinted in 1 collection
      22
    • 14. Cliven Bundy's Standoff — "A Million Ways to Lie in the West" — (A Million Ways to Die in the West movie parody poster) — Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Tom Richmond 23
    • 15. Rick Perry's "Intelligent" New Look — "Everybody Loves Rick Perry's Smart-Guy Glasses" — (as seen on TV ad parody) — Written by Mike Morse 24
    • 16. White House Security Breaches — "Better Homes unGuarded" — (Better Homes and Gardens magazine cover parody) — Art by Scott Bricher 25
    • 17. Putin Invades Ukraine — "Vlad Agrees: Red Bully Equals Aggression" — (Red Bull Equals Energy ad parody) — Idea by Matt Lassen 26
    • 18. Donald Sterling's Racist Rant — "Sports Segregated: Man of the Year 2014" — (Sports Illustrated magazine cover parody) — Art by Drew Friedman 27
    • 19. The Iraq War "Experts" — "Guardians of the Fallacy" — (Guardians of the Galaxy movie poster parody) — Written by Lance Hansen / Art by Mark Fredrickson 28–29
    • 20. The V.A. Hospital Scandal — "Tomb of the Untreated Soldier" — (Tomb of the Unknown Soldier national monument parody) — Written by Alison Grambs / Art by Mark Stutzman 30
    9
  • Ad for a Few MAD Books
    31
  • 8 Keys to Becoming a More Effective Supervillain
    Sociopath to Success Dept.
    John Caldwell
    Reprinted in 1 collection
    32–33
  • Ad for Tons of MAD Books
    34–35
  • A MAD Look At The Old Testament
    Serge-In General Dept.
    Sergio Aragones / Color by Tom Luth
    36–39
  • Planet TAD!!!!!
    In Blog We Trust Dept.
    Written by Tim Carvell
    40–41
  • The MAD Vault
    Rotten to the Encore Dept.
    Article from MAD #325: Every Single New Year's Eve... —
    Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Tom Bunk
    42–43
  • Spy vs. Spy — elastic taser wires spring gun / sewer gator up through attache case
    Joke and Dagger Dept.
    Peter Kuper
    44–45
  • 46
  • The Strip Club
    Pen and Stink Dept.
    47–50
  • Chilling Thoughts — 2014 Edition
    The Fright Stuff Dept.
    Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Evan Dorkin and Sarah Dyer
    52–53
  • The Best of The Idiotical
    Our Daily Dread Dept.
    • The Obama "HOPE" Poster Updated for 2014
    • 6 Reasons for Netflix's Stock Plunge
    • Other Products Toys "R" Us Should Ban
    • The Startling Similarities and Differences Between Oscar Pistorius and Oscar De La Renta
    • Starbucks' New Delivery Slogans
    • MAD Presents Great Moments in Government — Richard Williams art from MAD #414 cover
    • MAD Asks... Where is Kim Jong-Un
    • White House Unveils Deadly New Security System
    54–55
  • One Evening at the White House
    A Day at the Breach Dept.
    Art by Tom Richmond
    56
  • Ad for Subscriptions
    with MAD #126 bonus print
    C3