MAD #416 — April 2002

"The problem with instant gratification is that it often takes too long!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Contents Page
  1
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.

  Notes

  • Plug for MAD About Super Heroes book, Readers respond from MAD #412 with best Snappy Answers, You Know You're Osama bin Laden When... (Art by Ray Alma), Vey To Go — “friends and family suffering” (P. C. Vey) — sample
  2–4
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine)
• MAD Magazine's Privacy Policy

  An Embarrassment of Richard's Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo
  5
• Bored of the Rings — The Feebleschtick of Ka-Ching! (movie satire)

  Kicking the Hobbit Dept.

  Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Hermann Mejia

  Reprinted in 7 collections

  • MAD Art — 2002 (excerpt)
  • MAD About The Oscars — 2004
  • MAD About the Movies — Director's Cut — 2008
  • Totally MAD — 2012
  • The Best of the Worst! — Special Collector's Edition 2012
  • Totally Useless MAD — 2013
  • MAD Spoofs Sci-Fi and Fantasy — Special Collector's Edition 2018
  6–10
• MAD's Prime-Time TV Listings

  Grid and Bear It Dept.

  Written by Dana T. Graf / Art by Rick Tulka

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #12 — January 2007
  12–13
• Drama on Page 14 — bear shakes Brenda's ashes like pepper

  Grim and Bear It Dept.

  Written by Michael Gallagher / Art by John Caldwell
  14
• Monroe and... Babysitting — Part One

  Angster's Paradise Dept.

  Written by Anthony Barbieri / Art by Bill Wray
  16–19
• MAD Examines Selected Pages in a Typical High School Theater Program

  The Playbill's the Thing Dept.

  Written by Butch D'Ambrosio / Art by Monte Wolverton

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #23 — October 2008
  21–24
• The MAD (Dead) People Watcher's Guide at a Typical Cemetery

  The Plot Sickens Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by James Warhola
  26–27
• Their Team... Your Team...

  In the Ire of the Beholder Dept.

  Written by John Prete / Art by Tom Richmond

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #18 — October 2007
  28–30
• Memo to the American People from former Enron Chairman and CEO, Kenneth Lay

  Reading Between the Lies Dept.
  31
• Spy vs. Spy — beehive missiles

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Peter Kuper

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • Spy Vs. Spy 2 — The Joke and Dagger Files — 2007
  • Spy vs. Spy — The Top Secret Files — 2011
  32–33
• The Final Minute of Saturday Night Live

  Jive from New York Dept.

  Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Drew Friedman

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #19 — November 2007
  34–35
• If Medical Marijuana Was Legalized

  Weed the People Dept.

  Written by Pranav Behari / Art by Kevin Pope
  36–37
• A MAD Look at The Lord of the Rings

  Serge-In General Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  38–41
• Sports Acronyms You Never Knew Existed

  Alphabet Scoop Dept.

  Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Paul Coker, Jr.

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #16 — July 2007
  42–43
• MAD's Celebrity Cause-Of-Death Betting Odds: Drew Carey

  Grieving Las Vegas Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by Hermann Mejia

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #18 — October 2007
  44
• No Emotions Eleven (movie satire)

  Clooneytoons Dept.

  Written by Arnie Kogen / Art by Angelo Torres

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Classics #15 — June 2007
  • MAD #26 — August 2022
  • MAD Treasure Trove of Trash — Vol. 2 — Aug/Sept 2022
  46–51
• Fold-In — What ogre is destined to have a frightening presence this Oscar night?

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964–2010 — 2011
  C3