MAD #243 — December 1983

"Adam was lucky! He never had to listen to Eve talk about the other men she could have married!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Ad for Subscriptions — Why Kill Yourself?

  big duck in a shooting gallery

  Written by Don (Duck) Edwing / Art by Paul Coker, Jr.
  C2
• Contents Page
  1
• Letters Dept.
  2
• Ad for Big MAD on Campus Paperback
  3
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine) summary
• Stuporman ZZZ (movie satire)

  The Last Super Dept.

  Written by Stan Hart / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Special #67 — Summer 1989
  • MAD Capades — 1992 (Paperback #89)
  • MAD About Super Heroes — 2002
  • MAD Presents Superman — Summer 2013
  4–10
• MAD's Aptitude Test Number One — Will You Make a Good Doctor?

  BS.A.T. Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 5 collections

  • MAD Special #68 — Fall 1989
  • The Porpoise-ful MAD — 1991 (Paperback #88)
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — Turd in a Series — 2003
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — The Mother Load — 2004
  • MAD's Greatest Writers — Frank Jacobs — 2015
  11
• Don Martin's Superman III Out-Takes

  Clip Service Dept. Part I

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • MAD Presents Superman — Summer 2013
  12–13
• Cosmetics For Kids

  Kids and Make-Up Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #65 — Winter 1988
  14–15
• The Lighter Side of...

  Berg's-Eye View Dept.

  Dave Berg

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #68 — Fall 1989
  • Swing Along With MAD — 1991 (Paperback #87)
  16–20
• The MAD School of Parenting Catalogue of Courses

  Dire Rearing Dept.

  Written by Stan Hart / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #66 — Spring 1989
  • Swing Along With MAD — 1991 (Paperback #87)
  21–24
• Talking Cars of the Future

  Audio-mobiles Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Paul Coker, Jr.

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #68 — Fall 1989
  • MAD Capades — 1992 (Paperback #89)
  25–27
• If Certain Celebrities Married... What Would Their Children Be Like?

  Designed Genes Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #68 — Fall 1989
  28–29
• Amending the Rule Books to Cover Sportscasters

  Announcer Prevention Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Jack Davis

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #68 — Fall 1989
  • Swing Along With MAD — 1991 (Paperback #87)
  30–32
• The Book of MAD

  Humor in a Biblical Vein Dept.

  Written by Lou Silverstone

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #80 — March 1992

  • Noah's Ark Cover — Art by Jack Rickard — sample
  • Footnotes* to Current Events
    Shoe Biz Dept. — Art by Paul Coker, Jr.
  • The Lighter Side of Marriage / Sacrifice
    Berg's-Eye View Dept. — Art by Dave Berg
    Reprinted in 1 additional collection

    • MAD's Greatest Artists: Dave Berg — 2013
  • One Thursday Afternoon During the Plagues
    Don Martin Dept. — Art by Don Martin — sample
  • A MAD Collection of Very Thin Scrolls
  • Don't Ye Hate...? — Art by Jack Davis
  • When Somebody Sayeth, He Really Meaneth... — Art by Bob Clarke
  • MAD's “Prophet of the Year” — Art by George Woodbridge
  33–37
• Job-Related Injuries in Non-Athletic Careers

  Black-and-Blue and Read All Over Dept.

  Written by Dennis Snee / Art by Jack Rickard

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #80 — March 1992
  38–39
• Don Martin's Return of the Jedi Out-Takes

  Clip Service Dept. Part II

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 7 collections

  • MAD Special #65 — Winter 1988
  • MAD Star Wars Spectacular — 1996
  • MAD Star Wars Spectacular — Summer 1999
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • MAD About Star Wars — 2007
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — Don Martin — 2014
  • MAD Spoofs the ‘80s — Special Collector's Edition 2016
  40–42
• T.S. Shnooker (TV satire)

  Police Farce Dept.

  Written by Lou Silverstone / Art by Angelo Torres

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #65 — Winter 1988
  43–47
• Spy vs. Spy — bag handle grenade clip

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Antonio Prohias

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • MAD Special #68 — Fall 1989
  • Swing Along With MAD — 1991 (Paperback #87)
  • Spy Vs. Spy — The Complete Casebook — Antonio Prohias — 2001
  • Spy vs Spy — Mega Mini Kit — 2010
  • Spy Vs. Spy — Omnibus — Antonio Prohias — 2011
  • MAD Presents Spy Vs. Spy — An Explosive Celebration — 2015
  48
• Fold-In — What great sporting event could bring families together again?

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964–2010 — 2011
  C3
• Back Cover — One Day on the Sixth Floor

  Written by Don (Duck) Edwing / Art by Don Martin

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Color Classics #4 — September 2001
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • Totally Useless MAD — 2013
  C4